Thursday, August 6, 2015

The Comparison Trap

"When they measure themselves by themselves and compare themselves with themselves they are not wise." - 2 Corinthians 10:12

It has been said that when we compare, we err. How hard it is, in this world of abundance and tragedy, to keep our mind on our blessings and the Source of them, on what is most important, on our own purpose here, and to be thankful and content with what we have. Comparing our lives with someone else's is never a win-win situation. We are all uniquely made and different from each other in as many ways as we are alike. We all have a tendency to judge and so we will naturally compare up or down. And we will wind up feeling either better than or worse than the person or circumstance we are comparing ourselves to. Fortunately our worth is not based on how we measure up next to others. Every person is of immense value to God and His kingdom. God does not look at outward appearances, but at the heart (1 Samuel 16:7). The more we focus on how much God loves us and His power in us to accomplish His will for our lives, the less we will compare ourselves to others. As we grow in the grace and love of God, we can look at others and instead of judging them or ourselves through comparing, we can appreciate each person for who they are regardless of their status or disposition. We are able to have compassion and use the gifts that we have to contribute, realizing that each person, including ourselves is of equal worth. We will not feel threatened nor will we feel superior. 

The Bible talks about the different parts of the body and how valuable each part is. The hand cannot do the job of the foot and the eye cannot do the job of the ear (1 Corinthians 12:14-18). In the same way we each have our own purpose which no one else is meant to do, and which adds to the fullness of the body of Christ. How foolish for us to base our own or someone else's value on acquired roles, levels of understanding, or number of accomplishments. For we cannot judge another person's life from the limited view we have. Only God sees all, knows all and understands all. 

What we do know is that we all fall short of God's glory and that Christ died for everyone no matter what they've done. And there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. (Romans 3:23, John 3:16, Romans 8:1). So we may live joyfully beside one another accepting ourselves where God has us and accepting others where God has them. Each person is learning and growing at his or her own pace. So where is comparing? It is buried at the foot of the cross.

"I will give thanks to you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made...." Psalm 139:14

By: Francine Costanza, LCPC

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