Letting Go

People struggle everyday with letting go.  Sometimes we dwell about the past, thinking of old regrets and things we would do differently or maybe not at all.  We carry these thoughts with us and let them burden us, afraid to let them go, and unable to see beyond all these things we are carrying. When we get to the day that we don’t want to keep these burdens anymore, we can stop and realize that we have options.  We can stay where we are and hold all of our fears, woes and bad memories, or we can drop them off, give them to God and continue on the path.  The more we release these burdensome thoughts, the freer we feel, able to embark on whatever we want.  We will feel like a truer version of ourselves, able to live in the moment and look forward, enjoying the present.  What we realize is that it’s not about the baggage we’ve accumulated that makes us who we are, but what we learn from our experiences and apply to our lives, developing the person we are capable of being.  Our experiences don’t define us; they are part of our journey of growth. We don’t need to let the unpleasant ones weigh us down. We can release them, trusting in God for what we may not yet understand or like, and being thankful for the life we have now.

People also tend to fall into the trap of worrying about the future. The thing about this kind of worrying is that nothing good comes of it.  We cannot control the future.  We can plan for it. We can prepare for the “what ifs” but then we need to step back and let life run its course, doing what we can in the moment, for the present need in front of us. Doing what is needed now and only now in this moment, will keep us peaceful, knowing that in this moment we will handle what happens, and we will handle what happens in the future when it becomes the present.  When we choose not to dwell on the past that we cannot change or on the future which we cannot control, we experience a new freedom, where true options open up as we live creatively and intentionally right now.

Every moment we have choices. We can choose to trust God. We can choose to let go of the past, even what happened five minutes ago. We can choose to do what we can to make things better now and for the future.  We can let go of what might happen down the road, knowing that when we get there we will be given all that we need to handle it.  We can choose to take good care of ourselves and to be kind to ourselves and everyone we meet knowing that we all have challenges and struggles in life.

A famous prayer that is often quoted is the Serenity Prayer. It can remind us that we only have to do what we can and then let God do the rest.

“God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. Living one day at a time, enjoying one moment at a time, accepting hardship as the pathway to peace. Taking as Jesus did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it. Trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His will; that I may be reasonably happy in this life, and supremely happy with Him forever in the next.”   Reinhold Niebuhr

By: Francine Costanza, LCPC